6 Comments Dolph Lundgren wins his women and his poker games

Article written by the brilliant Sean Lloyd on the 28 Aug 2009

I actually had no idea that the blonde porn star sounding character in the current Silversands adverts on TV was Dolph Lundgren! Yesterday was a good day for me as I spent it on Twitter harassing celebrities, and when I wasn’t doing that I was messaging chicks on Facebook (I actually don’t even exist, my world is virtual)

I was maxing a Twit, Tweet, Twitter or whatever with Clayton and Dan and Clayton mentioned that the guy in the Silversands advert was none other than Dolph Lundgren, action hero el maximo!

I always imagined Dolph to be the sort of guy that takes a French Holiday. You don’t know a French Holiday? Crisis what is wrong with you? It’s something I came up with a while ago and you cannot use this without referencing myself or SLXS Cape Town.

A French Holiday is when you go away, but don’t pack like a normal person does. When going on a French Holiday, you pack like those dirty French porn stars do, packing the following:

Bialetti stove top espresso machine


Gauloises cigarettes

You will drive to your destination in a Citroen

Piz Buin SPF 2 tanning oil. Or any oil from the grocery cupboard.

Speedo or something similar. Think as porno as possible.

And that’s it, you’re ready for your French Holiday, no clothing, nothing needed!

So I  thought that I would let you know that the guy you have been wondering about in the Silversands television adverts is Dolph Lundgren.

Dolph Lundgren was born Hans Lundgren on 3 November 1957 and is a Swedish actor, director, model, and karateka.

He is known for his tall stature and level of fitness and he stands at 6′ 5″ (196 cm) and weighs over 240 lbs (109 kg). He belongs to a generation of film actors who epitomise the movie action hero stereotype including Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Steven Seagal, and Jean-Claude Van Damme, some of whom he has worked with in his career.

In 1985 (The year the Gods of Cape Town were born…ahem…) Lundgren starred in Rocky IV as the Russian boxer Ivan Drago.


Stallone and Lundgren

My personal favourite story is the one about a woman who was tied up in her own house by robbers and then they fled in fear of their lives. It turns out they had broken into Dolph’s home in Marbella, Spain and tied up his wife!

They saw a photo in one of the bedrooms of Dolph and his kids and fled the house, knowing that if Dolph came back and found them they would be turned into porridge.

Check out Dolph’s website

And please enjoy what happens when you try right click, save image on his photo on his website. Look what comes up:


Brilliant! You do know who Thor is don’t you?

You might remember Will Ferrell saying “By the hammer of Thor!” Absolutely fantastic.

Check out Dolph on Knickerpedia

And that ladies and gentleman, is why they call me the Mother Theresa of my generation.


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I hate DOlf so much… so an irritation… Wasnt to bad when he tried to take on Stallone, but now he is just a fool…

His ads are fucking terrible as well…

I just saw when I went to his website, he is starring in a new movie, you got to be kidding me!! I personally wont go watch it… hahaahhahaha

I still lag though at the Silversands ad…it’s so porno I get hysterical watching it.

I win my fights.
I win my girls.
I win my poker games.

All said with a cheesy grin and the accent. Ha!

He is without any shadow of a doubt: the prized pillock currently on TV, that clearly has been smacked in the mouth far too many times for being the aformentioned! How very nice you win your “poker gameshhhh” Dolph, how very nice for you.

What can I do with Twitter?

September 10 2009 19:45 pm Sean Lloyd Website

You can be awesome!

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