Cheldon, one of our readers, sent me a whole host of photos yesterday but I was busy saving other parts of the world and was unable to check e-mail and save burning buses in Cape Town. Anyway, funny enough this bus was a Translux and I was in Checkers yesterday (Don’t ask) and saw an advert for Translux. I kid you not, this is what it said:

“GO! Fall in love on a Translux”

It then had a couple holding each other.

Fall in love on a Translux? Are you from THE Plein? Are you a Parow Arrow? Are you a Bellville Bomber?

Who in their right mind (Not on Tik) would fall in love on a Translux?

I mean, I can imagine falling in love on a Concorde, or on Clifton 4th (Happens to me all the time), or falling in love at school when you are surrounded by the same chicks all the time and after a while you just tend to fall in love with them, but on a bus?

I think we’re taking the wrong marketing angle here, guys. The only type of love you might get on a Translux is the “I’m so horny I’ve been on this bus for ten hours and will do anything that moves” type of sex. I don’t think that’s really love either, especially when you don’t know the chicks name and the first time you had sex was while moving through Zimbabwe or something.

Anyway, I believe that’s why the bus exploded, it had come from Joburg and the sexual energy was electric, causing the engine to explode, or causing someone to blow their load. Either way, a sexually deprived trip from Joburg will end in an explosion either in your pants or in the bus engine. Ha, imagine coming all the way from Joburg thinking “Yeah, maxing it in Cape Town with all the fashion models” and then your bus explodes. It’s SO kak to lose!

Either way, it turned out like this:

Something appears to be wrong

Oh, I also found this amusing, on the Translux website, under “Safety”:

“All our buses undergo stringent maintenance programs designed to ensure that our buses are reliable and always comply with the highest safety and maintenance standards. Autopax has fully equipped workshops, operated by highly qualified technicians to ensure that the vehicles are always in perfect conditions” (Isn’t it condition?)

“Always in perfect safety conditions”

Clearly…

Sean Lloyd

Editor