(Because I’m deeper than a shallow pond, from time to time I offer insight on the stuff that really matters in life. This is one of those rare pieces!)

And I’m not talking about sex constantly happening, but rather pointing to the fact that is is the only thing that always works when trying to promote or sell things. It’s easy and takes a lot of the guess work out of trying to figure out whether a campaign will work or not.

We see it all the time, hot promotion girls selling products at nightclubs, promotion girls for Red Bull, on golf courses…in fact anywhere where men might go. It’s easy to think up (Put minimal clothing on hot girls for maximum exposure)

The Finger clothing brand in Cape Town know this all too well, and at any event where they are, they have by far the hottest girls wearing their kit. With guys, advertising is easy, throw the products amongst some models and they’ll buy it or at least give it more than a glance. Check this out from Pro-X this year:

Promoting knee braces…ha ha ha SUBTLE use of sex sells there. But do they protect from carpet burn?

And because I have many hours spare to contemplate life, solve the worlds financial crisis, dispense priceless advice to those in need, I have time to watch TV. And all the TV shows have one thing in common: One absolute belter of a presenter amongst a team of guys!

But it works and it just goes to show that guys are easy to please. Give us a TV show of guys making cars look awesome, scams that really happen and things getting blown up and we’re happy. We don’t need to be sipping on a ‘Flaming Boner’ or an ‘Adonis’ Orgasm’ or whatever it is that chicks drink while eating some cranberry reduction Peking duck with a crisp caramel-almond shell.

We’re very easy to maintain!

I don’t want to push this too far, but I’m sure the planet digs us more because we’re not constantly buying ’stuff’ We have one pair of winter shoes, one jacket, one pair of jeans and this has got to add up to some sort of environmental saving right there. Granted we do like driving cars and flying planes and burning car tyres, but you know, if we work it all out guys are surely more environmentally friendly.

But that’s not the point of this, is it?

The point of this is just an observation of how awesome it is to be a guy, because we make other peoples jobs easily, namely marketing and advertising people. Throw in some hot chicks and well done buddy, your entire campaign is sorted!

For instance, blonde belters need to be used for drunk driving campaigns…wait…no we’re getting confused here. We’ll totally miss the point of the campaign.

If we look at Overhaulin’ with Chip Foose, we have A.J:

I don’t recall your name but I recall you once wearing a…Fez?

In Mythbusters we have Kari, while not belting, you do kind of take a liking to her. I liken it to when you go onholiday and you’re staying with girls who you wouldn’t normally hook up with, but after 10 days in a house together in some place far from home, you’re like “Well, she’s a bit of alright!” Yeah…you guys know EXACTLY what I’m talking about! (You dirty dogs!)

Viewings should drop know that she is pregnant (Not mine)

Then in The Real Hustle we have Jessica Jane Clement, who borders on NSFW every day of her life! I’m pretty sure she doesn’t own many clothes, just whips and strawberry lube.

Promoting Lynx body spray etc…I mean have you ever seen them trying to punish the sex sells angle like this?!

And that’s it really, for a successful TV show or campaign, just add sex. Whether your original message gets across or not, guys will support your brand as long as you keep giving them the good stuff.

We’re easy like that.