I follow Richard Branson on Twitter (Follow him HERE) as I’m always on the lookout for new information on entrepeneurship and anything relating to Richard Branson as I find his life story fascinating. His latest idea?

It’s called Pitch TV and could be the break you as an entrepeneur are looking for. This is how it works:

Film yourself pitching your business idea, and make sure the video is no longer than 2 minutes. Then upload it HERE. The community will then vote for the best pitches, and every month the 5 best pitches will make it onto the new Pitch TV show which premieres on board Virgin Atlantic flights.

Every year, Richard Branson will also personally select his favourite pitch and receive a very special prize, which is being kept under wraps for now (The mans a billionaire, the prize can’t be too kak)

So that’s where we’re currently at. Read more on this over HERE on Richard Bransons Blog.

Get back at school bullies, hot chicks who ignored you and the cool kids at school, by getting your pitch noticed, making millions of dollars and giving the bird to everyone who ever ignored you.

SICK!

Sean Lloyd

Editor

I was just this very second stalking a chick on Facestalk and downloading all her photos onto my cock hard drive, when I saw an advert. I clicked the ad. It said “20% off all CT traffic fines”

It sent me to THIS link.

It’s called Mekaish Fine Management. It says they have had a close working relationship with the Transport Department and Traffic Services for the past 15 years.

Spiced? I’m not sure.

Check it out for yourself.

Sean Lloyd

Editor

Someone was telling me the other day about how spot on I am when it comes to trend hunting and just knowing what’s cool, rad and excessive in the world.

This is one of the many reasons why I started two websites a while back. You probably have not heard of them, one is Trend Hunter, and the other one is The Cool Hunter.

Yeah, they’re alright, probably not my best work though.

So let’s just catch something that is popular overseas but not quite so well known here.

It’s something called dry or raw denim and you won’t find it at any regular store. Dry denim is completely untreated and unwashed denim. The denim is dyed, and no water or chemicals touch it afterwards. The jeans are presented raw and it is up to you, the wearer, to give them character and wear lines.

There are no pathetic, fake wear lines on them and each pair will wear to it’s owner, based on the things they do, the lifestyles they lead and the people they bang.

Many people mistake dry denim with a regular pair of denims, such as your standard, non worn Levi 501′s. While these denims might seem as though nothing has touched them and they are raw, they are not. You can have a pair of 501′s forever and they won’t wear like a proper pair of dry denim jeans.

At the moment dry denim is not quite popular amongst the South African crowd but I think it will gain momentum. I think the main thing is our modern day culture of quick satisfaction. We want everything now, and will pay for someone in a factory to sand our jeans down and add chemicals to them to achieve the worn in, vintage look.

But a small crowd of enthusiasts are tired of wearing a pair of jeans that look exactly the same as the other person in the club. They want their jeans to reflect their personal life and are opting to buy dry denim, and wear it in themselves.

Dry denim is a process and for the first six months (If you wear your jeans every day) you are not allowed to wash them. If you wear them less frequently, you wont be able to wash them for longer. Some say dry denim should never be washed, just aired. I’m part of that crowd.

The longer you leave them before you wash them, the better they will look.

If you are looking for dry denim in Cape Town, the best place to look is Loading Bay in Hudson Street (Click HERE) or Fabiani (Click HERE)

Loading Bay offer the Blue Blood brand of dry denim, while Fabiani carry the sought after G-Star Raw range, the ones which I’m currently sporting. JP of The Loading Bay in Cape Town has recently launched a stand alone BlueBlood store in Cape Town, sitauted at Shop 104, Riebeeck Square, Bree Street, Cape Town.

Raw denim not only reflect your lifestyle, but they are kinder to the environment because no extra chemicals are used to age the denim, and you also very rarely (If ever) wash them.

You all know that at SLXS I don’t recommend anything that I have not personally tested and approved, and once again I will not let you down. I’m telling you now that buying a pair of proper dry denim jeans will completely change your life. You will never buy another pair of denim jeans again. They are expensive, but then again, so is cocaine.

You’re looking at dropping at least R2000 on a pair, but it goes right up to around R5000 for a pair of true dry denims. But look at it this way:

If you only wear your jeans once in your lifetime, they will have cost R5000 to wear. Wear them twice and they have only then cost R2500 for each time that you have worn them. Wear them for only a year and they have only cost you R13 to wear them each time! And who only wears a pair of denim jeans 365 times? No one! We all wear our jeans more than that.

Pair your dry denims with a pair of Converse All Star High Tops (Around R300 – R350 at most stores. Got mine at Street Fever in Canal Walk), and a black or white t-shirt and you’re all set to rock out.

One of the best resources on the internet to check out how dry denim wears in is MyNudies. Nudies are a brand of dry denim, and were once available at Woolworths in Cape Town, but no longer. The type of wear on your dry denims is also affected by what you keep in your pockets,so you will see noticeable fading around wallets and cellphones, such as this photo I found:

Dry denim jeans are only available from the finest stores in Cape Town. Try Fabiani and Blue Blood. The G-Star Raw range of denims from Fabiani kick a serious amount of ass, and I’d recommend them.

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

So we’re chilling at Nood Bar in Claremont (Below The Quadrant apartments, where J, Kate and Jo reside) on Saturday night when I start chatting to Gareth and saying “You know G-Dog, have you heard of a recession?”

He looks at me like I’ve just kicked a puppy in the head, completely bewildered, and even confused as to what I have said to him.

“Dude, I don’t understand the question” He says, sipping on his drink, and pondering how to snare the cougar from across the bar.

“Sweet” I replied.

“Now let’s get some Pussy” I followed up.

And then we invented it. Sitting at Nood Bar on a Saturday night the SLXS crew invented a new drink.

LOVE

THE

RECESSION

It’s called the Blue Pussy and comes in at a recession blasting R307.

As one of our famed crew members, Marcel, said, talking of the contrast of mixing an energy drink and a high end whisky:

“Blue Pussy is like getting a Kenilworth Main Road hooker and then having sex with her at the Mount Nelson”

Ha! So here is how you get your own Blue Pussy. You go to Nood Bar, and ask for a double Johnnie Walker Blue and a can of Pussy. Then simply mix them together. I tell you what, that drink is a complete mind ache. There is something comforting about drinking a drinky drink that says the following:

• Bugger the poor

• Skip the recession

• Leave us alone you if you don’t live our lifestyle.

Arrogant? Perhaps.

Shallow? Of course.

Superficial? You bet!

The absolute hilarity of ordering a Blue Pussy at a Nood Bar is in fact too much to comprehend and you will absolutely love it! I mean, come now, who is excessive enough to actually order two shots of booze at R140 each, and then mix it with an energy drink? I guess it’s just G-Dogs way of completely bypassing the recession. People often ask us “How do you guys avoid the recession?”

And we avoid it with R307 drinks. Then they ask “But how do you afford it?”

Babes, don’t worry how we afford it, just think good things and good things will come to you. That’s what we do, we think good things and they come to us.

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

(Certain content removed here pertaining to another story, upon request)

You’ll enjoy this story, and you will probably know about it already if you mix in high society (Cough…cough…)

It was in Noseweek, November 2008, all facts as according to Noseweek article. Enjoy the front cover headline:

Not the way you’d want to make the front cover…

The Irelands: Also like to avoid recessions

Stuart and Sylvia Ireland were the characters in the story. Stuart is the countries sole distributor for all the most famous perfume brands in South Africa, including Chanel, Dior, Issey Miyake, Lacoste and Jean Paul Gaultier. Pimping in a Bentley Continental GT costing around R3 million, Stuart is chilled. His wife Sylvia regularly spent R1 million per month on clothing and her excess lifestyle. Her hair cost between R20000 and R30000 per month. They owed Callaghan in Cavendish Square R1,5 million, Lulu Tan Tan in the V&A Waterfront R342000 and Jimmy Choo R664000. That’s not bad going, and they were living the dream.

So anyway, Sylvias starts seeing this psychiatrist to sort whatever out in her life, and Stuart is paying R2000 a week for her to see this dude.

She ends up sleeping with the psychiatrist. Stuart is paying R2000 per week for his wife to have sex with the psychiatrist.

Whhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Ha ha ha heeeeeeeeeeeeee hooooooooooooooooo haaaaaaaaaaa!

Those of you accustomed to the SLXS way of living won’t find this story spicy enough. So I’ll hit you up again!

Enjoy this. The psychiatrist, Dr Berard and his business partner, Michael Edwards, get appointed directors of Prestige Cosmetics.

Stuart Ireland’s company is Prestige Cosmetics.

Stuart is paying R2000 a week for the psychiatrist to have relations with his wife, and then just sommer appoints him director of his company.

Oh come now! This is just too hysterical for words! But you know what, that’s what I love about Cape Town. You can pretty much do as you please because there is just money everywhere. While most people battle to find money around the world, Cape Town finds itself so excessive that people offload money onto people just so that these people can bang their wife. It’s all happening! Where else in the world do you find this?

Love you Cape Town. xxx

Sean Lloyd

Editor

I walked into the Apple store today to get an armband, and instead got clouted.

Which is quite a novel idea!

Clearly not really giving a toss about guys like Bernie Madoff, and everyone else who is taking a beating from this recession, they thought it would be cool to charge me R470 for an armband. Now I don’t really give a damn about money, because I’ve been growing it in my garden for years now. But there are friends of mine…proper drug addicts…who could get so much more stuff from R470. Well not when they do coke, but when they do tik. They could be tikking for ages on R470.

Your standard R470 note

More specifically, and totally losing my train of though, and wondering why the clown has no penis, you can get a 1GB iPod Nano for R650. Now to me a nano has more “stuff” in it than just an armband.

I’m going to court, and I will, and I’m sueing Steve Jobs for rabuse, because R470 is basically abuse for an armband just so I can listen to music while running up the Alphen Trail in Constantia at 8pm at night, where more abuse awaits me.

It’s all happening at the moment, and I’m getting abused. So that’s the vibe for today, Apple have completely ignored the recession.

Nice one guys…
Sean Lloyd

Editor 

I receive the biggest crock of rubbish sometimes, and I don’t know how to respond, so I usually don’t. Anyway, I received this from Songezo:

Yeah I can’t read that either. But enjoy how it says “Confidential” Not anymore!

“Dear Sir/ Madam I am a student at the Cape Peninsula University of Technology (CPUT) , I am doing mechanical Engineering sencond (His spelling) Year. We have been given a project to do, about submarine. I would like to come to your company to make an interview, about submarine”

And that’s it, no sign off, nothing!

I mean come now!

Firstly, do I look like I deal in submarines? Do I? Do I?

I don’t think so!

Secondly, what made you think I deal in submarines? I don’t recall anything about SLXS being about submarines. It’s about successful living, yes, it’s about excess sex, yes, but not submarines.

Unless of course you click HERE, you will find two articles mentioning submarines.

So good luck on the engineering degree, I’m sure you’ll do well.

Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

Once again, South Africa is proving to be the dream destination for not only leisure travellers, but sports teams and fans alike. Check this out…cough cough…Cape Town are hosting the opening of the Indian Premier League, at our very own Newlands.

Do you realise how big this is? I do and it’s massive!

The Twenty20 competition was moved out of India for security reasons. Enjoy that England were also considered as an alternative venue for the competition but I think the clashing of Pasty Poms and the Indian crooners would be too much. Not to mention the shit weather in England, the shit economy, people like Tony Blair, Gordon Brown and Boris Johnson.It’s basically a given that South Africa would be the only other place in the world to host such a prestigious event. The IPL starts in South Africa on the 18th of April.

It’s funny that people leave South Africa for other shores, but when we look at the best events in the world, they are hosted in South Africa.

2010 Soccer World Cup? South Africa!

Indian Premier League 2009? South Africa!

Lions Rugby Tour 2009? South Africa!

Incidentally I found some SICK Lions Rugby tour packages over at our buddies SA Sport Travel.

Ranging from 6 day too 38 day luxury tour packages, it’s going to be mental!

If you’re interested in having ALL of your tickets, accomodation and travel fixtures taken care of, then click SA SPORT TRAVEL and have a see what is on offer.

It’s all happening right now!

Sean Lloyd

Editor

I love being a guy, because I can have a bender of a night, wake up looking like death, walk to the corner cafe smelling of booze and cigarettes, be overweight and have no money in my bank account and yet STILL feel like a million bucks! If this happened to a chick they would kill themselves. This little story explains why Madonna does not pull off the following Louis Vuitton ad in any decent way:

NO!

She just looks old and siff, and women can’t let this happen when you’re a billionaire.

Now having said this, Keith Richards can have leather for skin, steel wool for hair and he still pulls off Louis Vuitton in an undeniable rock fashion.

YES!

It is one of the benefits of being a guy, that we can abuse ourselves and still be cool. Madonna exercises loads and still can’t be rad at her age.

Ha ha…it’s good to be a guy… (A vain, shallow and superficial guy)

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

Oh my God doll, this stuff is too gorgeous for words and you are going to absolutely plutz when you see it!

It’s cling wrap, or Glad Wrap and it’s tinted. I don’t know what colour this actually is:

Puce  wrap

Rouge?

Pink?

Salmon?

Puce? (No not POES)

Whatever it is, it is sure to spice up any dish with it’s decidedly camp styling. I’m thrilled by it. It is quite gay, but not quite as gay as the amount of beauty products my beauty cabinet currently sports.

Oh well, such is the high rolling lifestyle!

I got mine from Pick ‘n Pay.

I know, crazy!

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

I’ll be completely honest, I don’t ever read the news and I didn’t read it in college. My journalism lecturers would constantly remind me to read the papers because I knew absolutely nothing about the world. And I still don’t to an extent. I couldn’t tell you anything about Bob Mugabe, Julius Malema (Spelling?) and whoever else is playing the fool.

I just don’t like bad news as it takes a certain sparkle off my life and my humour. All newspapers the world over carry bad news and it’s not my scene, and that’s why I only read a select few things (Probably 4 South African blogs and nothing else)

When I read bad news I get sad. When I’m sad my writing is sad and it hurts me!

Which is why I gravitate to the funny stuff in life. “My booky wook” by Russell Brand is a class example!

Just putting on my serious face babes…

For those of you unaware, Russell Brand is the comedian with the big hair, let’s take a look:

He’s the uterly hilarious guy from Forgetting Sarah Marshall, who could ever forget him:

“I’ve lost a shoe…have you seen it anywhere? Excuse me, missus, I’ve lost a shoe…like this one. It’s like this one’s fellow…it’s sort of the exact opposite in fact of that – not an evil version, but just, you know, a shoe like this…but for the other foot.  Otherwise I’d have two right…”

Sheer brilliance, told in his classic British voice and humour!

You’ll also remember him as the guy who pulled the telephone sex prank on the dude from Fawlty Towers, Andrew Sachs. Read more HERE.

Anyway I’ve been reading his book and it’s going to be right up your alley.

It documents his early days and how his dad used to have all these loads of porn that he would watch, how an extra lessons teacher stuck his finger up his arse, his addiction to sex, drugs and alcohol (All true) and his experience with heroine. The guy is basically a walking miracle and plenty funny to boot.

When your book is called “My booky wook” and it starts off like this, then you are awesome:

“On the morning of April Fools’ Day, 2005, I woke up in a sexual addiction treatment centre in a suburb of Philadelphia. As I limped out of the drab dog’s bed in which I was expected to sleep for the next thirty wankless nights, I observed the previous incumbent had left a thread of unravelled dental floss by the pillow – most likely as a noose for his poor, famished dinkle”

And that’s only the first two sentences! It gets better literally by the page until you are rolling around laughing like you are Gatiep on tik!

It’s highly recommended by me, the SLXS stamp of approval.

Get it at your nearest Exclusive Books, or HERE on Kalahari.net

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

Great success! We managed to get nominated for “Best Post on a South African blog”

Now we need to vote so I can win and carry on writing such pieces:

So we can carry on living the dream and being ridiculous, vain, shallow and most importantly…superficial! Click below to vote, then once you get to the SA Blog Awards page, you need to scroll down, enter your e-mail address and an anti spam code and click “Submit”. When this is done, you will be sent a confirmation e-mail, click the link on that and it’s all done!

Yeah! Do it do it!

I can’t keep up this ridiculous workload (Ha!) without any recognition can I? No I can’t! And we especially can’t be writing such rude articles anymore if we are not award winners.

I really need this for my emotional state.

Thanks guys and girls.

Sean Lloyd

Editor

I get sent a lot of different things to test, from wanking tools (HERE) to moisturisers and many other things that don’t get mentioned on these pages for various reasons, mostly due to the sheer amount of products I receive.

Yet I was quite pleased when Mantality.co.za sent me a tube of Fino Soothe After Shave, as I have always had the problem of very sensitive skin both from shaving and general weather conditions. The 50ml tube of Fino Soothe After Shave Balm could not have come at a better time as I have just started using a bladed razor again (Moving from electric) and was having a couple of problems with ingrown hairs (On my face, not from my back, crack and sack wax. What? Oh nothing to see here…moving on)

So my routine included taking pain killers before my appointment…

Wait, sorry I’m talking about getting my balls waxed again. Apologies.

So my routine comprised the regular shaving gel and I’ve been using the new Gillette M3 Power razor, which gives a close and comfortable shave. However with a close shave also comes some form of irritation for sensitive and non sensitive skin alike.

My first memories of anyone shaving was my dad, using a one bladed razor, then slapping on Old Spice that would burn and sting…but he was an old school man! These days we can get by with better products that don’t sting or dry out the skin.

Enter Fino Soothe After Shave Balm…

Alcohol free so it won’t dry your skin out and fragrance free so it won’t iritate your skin which has just had a blade pulled across it. Fino Soothe is a blend of Vitamin A (Excellent for the skin) and fruit extracts to gently exfoliate, purify and revitalise the skin. It’s ideal for wet shaving, dry shaving and waxing to prevent ingrown hairs, razor bumps  and razor burn.

But enough of what the label says, did it really work?

No ingrown hairs, no razor burn…no problem!

Like an absolute charm!

The texture is creamy, but it absorbs very easily and is not greasy at all. Yet it stll managed to moisturise my admittedly very dry skin, and kept it moisturised all day, even through these changing weather conditions in Cape Town.

The best thing of all is the all natural fragrance of it. You can apply it and have no problem with it interacting with your regular eau de toilette. And the result:

Smooth, protected and well moisturised skin free of any stinging, ingrown hairs or razor burn.

You simple shave, and apply the after shave balm after patting your skin dry (Never rub your skin dry) and you are protected all day long by the natural ingredients found in Fino Soothe. Moisturised and protected skin equals healthy skin which is much more apt at protecting your body from external aggressors. Healthy looking and feeling skin also boosts your self confidence and makes you put out quite a sick vibe.

At R90 for 50ml’s, Fino Soothe get’s an official SLXS Editor’s Choice stamp of approval. It’s a top quality locally made products that delivers top results at a fraction of the price of imported brands and works hard at protecting your skin while you’reout saving the world, just as I do, every day!

Click HERE to order your Fino Soothe After Shave Balm from South Africas Leading One Stop Shop for the Urban Man, Mantality.co.za.

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

We always get these guides to using stuff such as Facebook and Twitter, but Ashton Kutcher sums it up in a picture, because he knows the old saying that a picture speaks a thousand words.

It started off with him posting a message on Twitter:

“watching my wife steam my suit while wearing a bikini. I love God!”

Followed by:

“I’m not wearing the bikini she is that’s what makes it so glorious”

Followed by:

“shhh don’t tell wifey” and this:

Demi Moores very fine and perky ass

BOOM! That just happened! I love it when celebrities use netowrking sites like this in a clever way. Ashton Kutcher has not been heard from in ages, and one photo and he is on the front page of every single celebrity gossip website on the planet. On his Twitter page, as of now, that photo has been viewed 287819 times. That’s not to mention the views where the photo has been posted externally. Brilliant.

That’s smart usage of new media. Twitter is now seemingly taking over from the paparazzi in letting fans inside the lives of celebrities. Why go look for photos of celebrities when they are posting their personal photos? In a way if every celebrity did this on Twitter, they could let the public in on their personal lives in a controlled manner, and people would flock to their Twitter pages for news instead of the regular media.

And then…BOOM…Heat MAgazine and YOU magazine close down.

I’m working I’m working…I’m a celebrity magazine editor writing wanky articles…I’m getting paid lots…BANG…Twitter…I’m unemployed!…BOOM…I’m dead!

Game over. All gone. Nice knowing you.

Find Ashton HERE on Twitter.

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

So yeah, I’ve obviously known about this for a while but I thought it pertinent to mention now, as I sit here at SLXS Mission Control while Rod Stewart pumps out “Maggie May”

It’s almost as if he is singing it specifically for me. This will be followed up by Lionel Ritchies “Do it to me” which always amazes me when Lionel croons thew words “You’re my MoTown lover”

Guaranteed to give you a woody! It’s like word Viagra!

So as you know, Earl Spencer, Dianas brother, has children and funnily enough they have chosen to reside in the best city in the entire world. That’s right our city, Cape Town. Interestingly the Spencer family worth is reportedly a cool one hundred million pounds (HERE), mostly tied up in estates and antiques. But I hardly think that matters, because if I had 100 million pounds (I can’t find the pounds sign on my laptop computer) I’d be seriously maxing the chillaxing to an insane level of sickness.

Naturally when your old family sits atop this sort of disgusting wealth, you’re pretty chilled. And pretty good looking. Because rick kids always turn out good looking. The only reason for this is that if they are born ugly they are put down. Scientific  fact.

So Kitty has turned out all rather nice looking and finds herself gracing the cover of Tatler magazine this month. Not to be confused with our “Tatler” newspaper, that old people write to complaining of stuff such as noisy neighbours and the disgusting youth of today. I imagine I’ll grace the cover of a magazine shortly, probably as “randiest blogger” or “most vain, superficial and shallow blogger” I’d dig that, if I didn’t hate the word “blog” so much. I’d like to be seen as a writer seeing as though it’s what I studied. I also hate the word “journalist” because it makes me sound like a freeloading, negative, alcohol and drug ravaging gimp.

Anyway enough about ME, let’s check out Kitty (How cool is that name?):

Fabulous wealth makes smiling a breeze

I…own…England

Economic recession? 

Crisis!

The best has to be in THIS article where she says “I don’t think I’d have been that happy growing up in England. Our way of life is so much more relaxed”

HA! Take that expats! If 100 million pounds and about a kazillion estates and access to the entire country can’t make a place decent, then I don’t know what can!

Sorry buggers but she does have a boyfriend. And that’s todays celeb news wrap!

Actually we never have a celeb news wrap, but whatever, that’s todays one.

Sean Lloyd

Editor