Just a quick note here. If you want to live like we do, play like we do and just get inside of the mind of SLXS, Entourage is a good program to start watching. The similarities are endless! I spoke about this a while ago when Season 4 was on pre-order, but now the Holy Grail has arrived!
So buy Entourage Season 4 over here.

And if you haven’t got hold of the other seasons, now would be a good time. Click the following to buy online. Basically you see things in one dimension and then order it through kalahari.net.

Then a real man, in real life, delivers a real product to your door. I know…insane!

Buy Entourage Season 1

Buy Entourage Season 2

Buy Entourage Season 3: Part 1

Buy Entourage Season 3: Part 2

Buy the complete 4th Season of Entourage.

Sean Lloyd

Editor

Why wasn’t I on to this earlier? You may well be asking yourself that.

You try living in hotels with open bars. For a living.

Exactly!

So that’s it. Cape Town tonight at 9pm. 1st Floor Fairweather House. 176 Sir Lowry Road, Woodstock. Tickets are R70 – R120. Buy online at GlobalBreakhrough.com

Sean Lloyd

Editor

We’ve spoken about hangovers once or twice here, and basically a hangover is when you look like a piece of biltong the morning after drinking copious amounts.

Although I sometimes like to keep my body guessing by drinking in the day, and confusing my body by getting a hangover at 9pm. Variety is the spice of life!

Anyway, with my last order on Mantality I was sent a whole host of Nickel products to test out and I have tried the Nickel Super Clean Face which is a face wash and exfoliator. It kind of makes my skin look like a babies because it’s so smooth after washing! Smooth as a babies bum.

OH. MY. WORD! I just made that up right now but it makes SO much sense! A babies bum is smooth! Amazing.

So anyway I’ve been punishing the tester of the Nickel Super Clean Face and then I waited until a night of bent proportions to test out the Nickel Rescue Gel.

My face was looking dull like a war zone and so I had a scrub with Nickel Super Clean Face to get all the smoke and booze out. And that grimy club atmosphere.

I then took out my sample of Rescue Gel, massaged it into my face and good grief! It’s most amazing as it has this cooling effect, and it’s also not greasy. It’s fresh and makes your face feel all cool like you’ve put a touch of ice on it. Best of all, it moisturises well in addition to firming your skin and making it look brand new.

An angel in disguise

It contains menthol, coffee and soy beans extracts which help to firm, decongest and stimulate your skin so the boss won’t even have a hint that you have been out on a school night. I always feel so naughty going out on school nights.

Especially when I look at school girls!

So that’s it, you can bend your life in half and still look like a million bucks the next day.

It almost feels criminal to be using these products, but they are 100% legal.

Click here to buy Nickel Super Clean Face.

And click here for the morning after shock treatment for your face, Rescue Gel by Nickel. Delivery on Nickel products is free as well!

If you need the morning after pill, you should have been shopping over here on Mantality.

Sean Lloyd

Editor

No, not a girlfriend with a headache. This:

The Arabella pool at night. Very ugly.

While mere mortals can’t comprehend this, I can. I was born to handle highly stressful and unusual situations like this. Not everyone is cut out for a job of absolute leisure and pleasure, but somehow my genetic profile allows it.

It’s so hectic at the moment, dealing with all of this! But I’m fine.

Seriously, I am. No need to worry about me.

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

I suppose I may as well have a swim. It’s not the worst pool in the world that Arabella near Hermanus is sporting. It certainly does inspire one to get a little wet.

I don’t know if my energy levels are correct though, after ending off the day with a few bogies, eagles, leopards…whatever all the golf speak is.

Tra la la la la 

Chilled.

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

I had been locked up in my hotel room for a good deal of the day, only venturing out to ask David, the duty manager I believe, where my next drink was coming from. It had been a long tiring day at The Cullinan Hotel where I had been on the internet keeping up international affairs and trying to please the Cape Town crowd with my wit and flair. Not to mention my cheese grater abs and pecs like bricks.

An average workday for me

It was now the evening and as an esteemed guest at the Nokia launch party in Cape Town’s V&A Waterfront I was ready to make my way through.

I decided that it would only be fair to alert the organisers that my undeniable presence would soon be arriving. Prepare mojitos, food and girls. Clothing? Optional.

I sent the following through

“The eagle is ready to depart. Prepare for landing.”

I was only 5 minutes away from the Waterfront and took the shuttle through with some of the crew.

“I’m not really sure if cross referencing the hedge funds on the bull end of a bear market is the wise thing to do right now” I said to a guy next to me, who looked quite high up in Nokia.

Nokia — SICK!

I was trying to impress him by sounding clever, but he was more clever than me.

“What are you talking about?”

“Ah man going to get boozed tonight!” I replied, changing the subject.

“I don’t drink” He casually said, before getting back to his own thoughts.

Fail. Who doesn’t drink?

“Why don’t you have a liver?” I said, thinking I could now SURELY make him laugh.

“I’m Muslim”

“Oh shit son!” I said, realising that now I was properly cocking this whole thing up. I decided some quiet time was in order for me.

I arrived at the venue, which was a tent erected (Ha ha!) on the parking lot above Future Exotics in the V&A Waterfront.

The entrance was some sort of psychedelic vibe that I hadn’t seen since that time we accidentally dropped acid thinking it was just a sheet of paper we could pea-shoot with.

The entrance — Welcome to the jungle!

All sorts of colours were going on and I was sure I was having a relapse of sorts.

I’m freaking out man! No Sean, you’re not freaking out, you are freaked out!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Get me out of here!

I did a power run right through the entrance, like Beast would run through a defence line. Appearing on the other side, I was sure I was tripping as I had somehow arrived in heaven.

I’ve always dreamt of heaven as a place where all the best things are and this was surely it.

Booze? Check.

Gourmet food? Check.

Women? DOUBLE CHECK!

“God?” I said, looking at the ceiling.

“Mojito sir?”

“Yes thanks, did God make this for me that quickly?”

“Sir Liquid Chefs are here. Feel free to go to any of the bars for more cocktails.”

Liquid Chefs — Supplying fun and confidence

Nice, I’m comfortable with this. I minced my way through the venue and shot another two mojitos down the hatch, firstly because they were good, and secondly because the girl serving them was quite sexual. To those at the event (To those not: Plebbs) you will know the girl. The bar as you came down the ramp at the main entrance. Very nice! I think we have a photo.

Yes yes, you have a toit body. I can shee that from the shize of your troushers!

All sorts of gadgets were set up, including the Nokia N96 (I believe, as I was mild to middlingly trashed by the time I started playing) which was hooked up to a TV set and you could sit down and play games on it.

I played the car game and literally spun out on every corner. I was chatting to one of the promotion people around the pool the next day and he said to me “Were you the guy driving last night spinning everywhere?”It’s so good to drive drunk! Well on the phone anyway.

The Editor drives drunk. Make that inebriated. Legless after a heavy whiskey session.

I sat up from my advanced driving experience and toodled over to another crowd.

“You come here often?” I said to the angel next to me.

“Well no this is only being held once” She said, giving me “The Look”

Before I could utter a reply, I was off to shmooze with the rest of the crowd.

I shot a look around, wondering if someone was watching me. I was looking rather dashing and was sure chicks would be going mental for my vibe. The only thing looking at me was the sushi, so I put it inside of me.

Get inside me food!

“Get inside me sushi!” I shouted as it got fully inside me.

I was now alone and drunk and had lost my crew. One of my biggest fears in life is being alone and drunk, and here I was at a Nokia launch party drunk and alone. And the entire day I had been drinking whiskey alone in my hotel room. Was this the apocalypse? Possibly. I sauntered to the bar in the hope of taking another mojito home and also taking the bar lady home.

I tried to lean on the bar, so I could order a drink and chat the bar lady up.

“Hey sexy…” She didn’t even hear me as the music was pumping. Fail.

CRASH! AHHHHHHH!

I had leant onto the bar and knocked a glass off. Epic fail.

“Fook me” I shouted.

“Can I just get another mojito please”

“Of course” She replied, acting very professional as though nothing had happened.

I decided now was not the time to talk to her. I decided I should never talk to her. I mean, if I was that nervous around her after a few drinks and at a random party, imagine our future together?

I had decided earlier in the night we would have two kids, Storm and River. But imagine trying to propose to her? I would be a nervous wreck! And imagine trying to make Storm and River? I would be shooting blanks!

So my true love story was thrown out the window, and in came flying another mojito through the window.

Then as if out of nowhere these chicks come out on the stage, doing some sort of dance vibe, with fibre optics on their heads. It was all too much for me and I thought I would put my drink down.

MOSES! What they had done, was install a motion sensor bar counter, so that when you put your drink down, it lights up beneath it. There were then these direction signals with things such as “sushi” and the like written on them, kind of pointing you to the food. SICK!

SICK!

Later on the bar counter changed, and when you put your drink down a hand would come up and act as if was grabbing your drink.

MENTAL!

I nearly died of shock and tried to hit it, but it was not real! I tell you I nearly lost my mind and was now sure Liquid Chefs (Or that Liquid Angel) had spiked my drink. I was now convinced she was trying to roofie me up and take FULL advantage of me, as random people do in this town.Just when you think it can’t get more hectic, it starts pissing with rain on the stage. I thought it necessary to play the song by Travis in my head, where they sing “Why does it always rain on me?”

A sheet of rain. In the tent. MADNESS!

I was sure the guys had forgot to put a section of roof on and it was now raining and the whole launch was ruined. But it was too hectic for rain as it was a straight sheet of water. Then these dudes come out playing drums, IN THE RAIN! I shit you not, they were half kit off playing drums with the rain coming down behind them. I was pretty sure Matthew McConaughey was behind this, or The Village People, but they weren’t, they weren’t! Then there was out guy playing the didgeridoo(Spelling?).

Well then, gooday mate! Let’s put another shrimp on the bar-bee!

I was going completely bonkers as more drinks were persuaded to enter my mouth, the angel crafted me more mojitos and rumours still spun about that I was dating Marisa Miller AND Megan Fox, at the same time! They’re not really my type, a little too chubby. And after having a go at both of them already in Cabo in 2006, I’m over them.

What the launch was really about was a program that should change my life, your life, everyones life! And it’s called OVI.

We shall get into the details of the phones and OVI in the piece I am about to write. I actually missed the day presentation where people were briefed on all of this stuff, because I was in my room hanging like the Mona Lisa on crack.

That’s what I do for a living. I attend stuff. Launches, parties, beach, parties, beach parties, shindigs,weddings etc.

I’m the rent a crowd that drinks, eats, parties and gets naked.

So where was I? Oh yes, we will get into the actual point of the party in the next piece, aptly entitled “The actual point of the party in the next piece”

In the meantime I’ll pour myself a whiskey and try solve this global warming thing that Al Gore keeps insisting is real.

I can’t really feel anything in here. The aircon is pumping ice and the Jamesons is in my legs, which I cannot for the life of me feel.

This is good, real good.

I must make a major thanks to Nokia for letting me into this event as I am sometimes a hazard. Then to Siyabona Africa for supplying my lifestyle woop woop! Liquid Chefs for giving me some insane confidence on the night, and Extreem Kwizeen for supplying food to soak up the disgusting amounts of alcohol being consumed. And also to The Cullinan Hotel in Cape Town for putting up with me running through their passageways at all times of the night, declaring “The apocalypse is coming!”

Sorry about that one, I have no idea how that happened.

And to Nokia, you guys are seriously off the hook at the moment throwing a shindig like that! I thought I was at some sort of Urban Wave party. The only difference was that this time I kept my clothes on. What a mental launch party, with enough booze to float a battleship and enough food to keep Zimbabwe afloat for a good while. Again, economic recession? LIARS!

I’m throwing out such a sick vibe today!

Want some?

Sean Lloyd

Editor

I found myself burning along the coast last week, wind blowing in my hair, sunlight glimmering off the mighty Atlantic Ocean, a sparkle in my eye, a car full of food and booze…not a care in the world. I railed around the coastal route in search of Hout Bay and Chapman’s Peak.

In the summer of 2008 I was still listening to “Summer of ’69″ over the boom box in the car. The breeze was cool, my vibe sick, my guns tanned. The girls were chilling and happiness rolled through Cape Town.

Then I saw a billowing cloud of black smoke from my location at Llandudno.

I summited at Suikerbossie and realised that something quite spicy was unfolding! At first I thought a bar-bee from the Australians. I didn’t have time to stop and look for two reasons:

• I was on my way to Chapman’s Peak to drink champagne
• I didn’t want to look like a tourist.

So I later read on the news that 1000 people were left homeless after the fire. Or 1000 homes had burnt down. Or whatever…I’m not a numbers man (31% for Standard Grade maths in Matric. BOOM!)

Well anyway, while the residents of Imizamo Yethu were  trying to escape the fire, I wasn’t in quite the same predicament. The only predicament I had was what to do next. Buy a yacht, drink champagne, mingle at yet another social event where free food and booze are the order of the day or just chill.

Imizamo Yethu — Spot of bother

I decided I would chill with the champagne and get mildly acquainted with my surroundings.

The last of the fire smouldered. I drank champagne. What a cruel world! 

Always over cater for yourself 

What a glorious day on Chapman’s Peak! Remember, you can still access Chapman’s Peak for visits. You can’t actually drive the length of it because it is still being repaired. But you can access the picnic spots which are stunning. I will get onto those later and what exactly we did at Chapman’s Peak…on a Thursday afternoon.

We entered from the Hout Bay side and merely collected a day pass for free, and then chilled and toasted the sparklers to a lifestyle well lived.

You really should do it. Tell your boss to stick it, take a cruise along the coast on a Monday morning, enter Chapman’s Peak from the Hout Bay side and meet all your buddies for a booze fest filled with sun, laughter, chicks and nothing but that stunning view in front of you. You know the view. Yes that one.

You don’t?

Let us tease you for a moment…

Ohhhhh that’s naughty. Is that a sidecar in the picture? Were we silly enough to take a sidecar trip to Chapman’s Peak? Was I even in a car?

My mysterious life and occupation continues to elude most. But it’s all coming together.

Just wait…take a Prozac, two roofies and down a bottle of wine. I’ll see you after that. You’ll be calm enough to handle the full extent of this lifestyle journey I’m taking you on.

Sean Lloyd

Editor

Apologies once again for the silence, but I’m busy working…at The Cullinan Hotel in Cape Town! I went to a MASSIVE Nokia launch last night which I will hopefully be writing about in the course of the day, but I’m running around later doing work and keeping up public relations. It’s the most insane launch party I have been to in ages.

The Lambo at the launch party last night

Anyway, in true SLXS rock star style I’m locked up in my hotel room drinking whisky. Why you may ask? Because I can.

Enjoy the whiskey and the dead body on the screen. Going for my emo vibe, Johnny-Depp-trashing-hotel-room-style

The bar got bent in half last night and we ran a decent sized tab.

The pool at The Cullinan Hotel in the early hours of this morning

I have another function tonight so I’m in between writing and just living a lifestyle of crazy excess. Dropping some drinks off later in town, then I’m going to try get some writing done because I love all of you!

Sorry if I haven’t replied to any e-mails or comments on the site, I will get around to that but probably only tomorrow. Today is looking a bit mental so not much in the way of SLXS will be catered for.

I need to just put out a major thanks to Nokia for last night, and to my travel sponsors Siyabona Africa for having a large part in the organisation of last night, for putting me up in the hotel and basically allowing me to live a lifestyle of excess all year.

Once again we must ask ourselves, what economic recession?

Sean Lloyd

Editor

In my line of work as an international playboy I tend to suffer from the odd hangover, say three or four times a week ( Doctor P — I’m joking, I haven’t had a drink since you told me I had to stop or risk having a porridge liver by age 25 — I’m serious)

Now there are all sorts of things that claim to leave you without a hangover such as KGB and the like, but I know this is not true. Those four tablets I took once were in no way going to save me from a bottle of vodka. I know this, and so I don’t buy these pills.

You’re always going to get a hangover when you party like I do, so the trick the next day is to try and repair the damage that has been done with proper supplements. I’ve tried them all but came across a wild combination over years of alcohol abuse partying. I can’t guarantee it will work for you, but I get the most insane hangovers and it works for me.

Firstly let’s look at the supplements and then I will give you the dosage. These supplements help heal the gut, rehydrate the body and protect it from oxidants:

Vitamin C — In Patrick Holford’s highly recommended book, the “New Optimum Nutrition Bible”, under the nutritional healing guide for Alcoholism, it recommends Vitamin C as this helps protect the liver. Smoking and alcohol also deplete vitamin C, so it’s necessary to replace it. Vitamin C is recommended for everyone in The New Optimum Nutrition Bible as it has so many roles in the body, due to it being a potent anti-oxidant, perfect to protect the body from boozing and smoking.

L Glutamine — This helps heal the gut, and calm down inflammation in the intestines and of the intestinal lining. This is great after a big booze up, where your stomach will not be feeling in top shape! Glutamine also helps protect the liver.
Rehidrate — Because water just won’t be good enough. You need to get some electrolytes in to replenish that parched body!

The Holy Grail of hangover remedies

So here is the regime I use

Before I start boozing — A teaspoon of glutamine (Around 4 grams) in half a glass of water on an empty stomach. Two 500mg vitamin C tablets after that with a bit of food. It’s important to take vitamin C with food. Now is also the time to mix two or three sachets of Rehidrate with hot water, let it dissolve, then put it in the fridge. Make three seperate cups of Rehidrat, and leave them in the fridge. Each sachet gets mixed with 250ml’s of water.

During boozing — Go at your usual pace, rock out with your cock out, score as many chicks/ guys as you can. Dance like an idiot.

Upon arrival home (If you make it home) — Another teaspoon of glutamine on an empty stomach (If you haven’t already eaten Steers) Then have some food if you can, and another gram of vitamin . I take two 500gram vitamin C tablets. Drink one of the cups of rehydrate and try take in some more water. Then have a nice dos (Sleep)

In the morning — Look next to you, hopefully you have woken up next to an angel. Take a teaspoon of glutamine in half a glass of water on an empty stomach. This is important to take this first as you wake up. Then maybe have some food, another gram of vitamin C and another Rehidrate sachet. Then just drink loads of juice or water as usual. About two hours later have another sachet of Rehidrat.

This may seem quite a hectic schedule of supplements, but if you prepare everything in advance, it’s SO easy! I’m so used to preparing all of this, it’s not even a big deal anymore. It’s as natural as breathing to me!

This remedy works wonders for me and it’s something I live by. So give it a try and see how it goes!

The cheapest Vitamin C is from Clicks. A 100 tablet bottle (500mg tablets) costs about R35. Buy the USN L-Glutamine and ask for Rehidrat at the pharmacy.

Best in drinking!

Obviously if you have medical conditions, then speak to your doctor before supplementing. Although if you are drinking, I doubt you have any serious medical conditions. And always tell your doctor if you are abusing alcohol!

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

I know I haven’t written all that much, but leading the double life of a writer AND Cape Town super agent, I seem to be all over the place. This week I’ll be mingling amongst Kirstenbosch, The Cullinan Hotel and the Two Oceans Aquarium again. I can’t tell you about it now, but it’s VERY exciting! I very excite!

Then there is also the Hout Bay villa that I need to go to again. God it’s an amazing place. I’ll tell you about that possibly this week, maybe next week.

Ummm…what else? Oh I have found a fairly strong hangover remedy/ combination and that will also be here.

It’s all happening people!

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

I must be quite honest here because I’d never lie to you. Unless I was cheating on you and also writing for another website in addition to SLXS, then I would lie. I know you only want me to write for YOU, you are quite possessive over this relationship! To be honest I have written for other websites, but I only banged the secretaries of those websites, so it doesn’t count.

What the hell am I saying? I’m sorry, but this Cafe Culture is just so good!

So I have been meaning to tell you guys (Yeah this is a guys article) about my favourite t-shirt in the whole wide world. It’s a widely known fact in Cape Town that I pretty much exclusively wear white t-shirts all year round. Some people think I am dirty because I appear (You like that word? Feel free to use it, I just came up with it now) to wear the same t-shirt every day. In all honesty, all I own is white t-shirts. I’ve tried black, but it just doesn’t suit me as well.

The reason I wear white t-shirts every day is that I never have to choose a shirt, I just thrown on white and it goes with anything. I know it may seem boring, but white t-shirts are classics. James Dean wore it and everyone who is cool wears a white t-shirt. Like me! Cough…cough…splutter…

I stumbled into Woolworths a few months ago, drunk out of my mind looking for a roast chicken and I happened to spot, in the corner of my peripheral field (Shit I’m a good writer), a whole HOST (No, I’m an amazing writer) of white t-shirts, with a price tag of a mere R50. I thought this must surely be a joke, because on further inspection the t-shirts were made of 100% Organic Cotton.

I always thought organic was more expensive, but these weren’t, they weren’t! Anyway, I only weigh 70kg’s (But I’m ripped like a bee-atch) so I take the small and it fits…like a glove!

Anyway a white t-shirt paired with jeans and boots always makes you look like a rockstar and chicks dig rockstars.

Even more astonishing is the fact that it’s organic cotton so you get the rockstar vibe without killing the planet. Chicks dig guys who can save the planet but still give them a good rogering in the back seat of the limo on the way home.

What? Nothing to see here.

But seriously, according to this link, in India, home to over one third of the worlds cotton farmers, cotton accounts for 54% of all pesticides used annually despite occupying just 5% of land under crops.

So going organic makes sense!

The Woolworths organic cotton t-shirts are available in a whole host of colours, but white is the colour to go for.

So I went out and bought one or two white t-shirts. Because when you can find a t-shirt that fits you properly, just buy loads of them, you never know when a good fitting t-shirt will come around again.

I think the price is about R60 now, but it’s still very cheap. I’ve been wearing the Woolworths organic cotton t-shirts for a few months now and they haven’t shrunk or lost their shape at all.

Crisis I’m hungover this morning 

It’s also the perfect length, as I normally find t-shirts to be way to long.

Another top quality product from Woolworths!

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

I don’t want to come across as superficial or anything, but I do tend to like hot women. And I think in these days of nutritional awareness, there really is no need to be that big. Somehow bigger guys can get away with it, their mates will still high five them, they will still feel like a million bucks and chances are they will still get the job — even if they are a little bigger.

So on Friday night I was making my way through to FTV in Cape Town when I decided to be sneaky and pop into Tantra in Claremont to check out the vibe. Now I had heard that it was quite young, like school girl young, but I thought I would be very naughty and dirty and check it out anyway.

So this guy* is chilling at the bar, drinking a whisky, scoping out the general vibe. He sees a girl next to him at the bar (Quite a large girl), and is clearly not impressed.

He takes a sip of his whisky, looks at her and says

“Salad”

Girl gives him a weird look.

He takes another sip of whisky.

“Salad”

“Excuse me?” Says the girl.

“Salad”

“What the hell are you talking about”

“Oh don’t worry sweetie, I knew you wouldn’t know what a salad is”

Take a moment there. Breath in deeply. Count to ten.

OH

MY

WORD

THAT

CHICK

GOT

OWNED!

Have you ever in your life heard something so awesome! I know that in my existence I have never come across something so phenomenal! It leaves you somewhat speechless.

It’s quite phenomenal to actually be part of something like this, and I’m fairly sure that I can claim this. Claimed and owned!

The answer to your question is “Yes”

Yes that just did happen.

*This guy may or may not have been me.
Sean Lloyd

Editor

I laughed when I saw this, which I have very sneakily pulled from The House Of Marketing. Just don’t tell Shane.

Now THAT is quality.

Sean Lloyd

Editor 

I was stalking this absolute belter on Facebook earlier when I saw one of those ridiculous ads that get displayed. I remembered this article by Shaun Oakes, saying that we should probably click on these ads so Facebook can make some money and not close down.

So I clicked this ad and was brought to possibly the most ridiculous website of my life. Basically, you can get famous people to message you.

Jesus Jones, how low is your self esteem that you need famous people to message you. And I use the word “famous” VERY loosely. Here is the vibe of the website, clearly run by Ashton who is Punking us:

Welcome to My Famous Names

Want to hear directly from your favourite celebrity REGISTER NOW and receive sms & mms messages directly to your cellphone, directly from theirs

Hey, what has this world come to?

The reason I used the word celebrity so loosely is because their “Top 10 popular celeb’s” list is as follows:

• Kurt Darren (Shaun Oakes must have something to do with this)
• Sasha Martinengo (This is some sort of cruel joke)
• Stefan Ludik (Of Big Brother “fame“)
• Ryk Neethling (Small chap)
• Roxy Louw (Ok I’m 100% cool with this)
• Izak Davel (Who?)
• Butch James (Weak guy)
• Jonty Rhodes (I think he was in that movie Back To The Future)
• AB De Villiers (God, imagine if it was ABC De Villiers)
• Fokofpolisiekar (Translating directly to Fuck Off Police Car)

I really am speechless.

Furthermore, after reading that I have lost the ability to get an erection.

Forever.

Click here to go to the “website”

What makes it even more stunning is that they are running Google ads on the left side of the page. Too stunning for words.

Sean Lloyd

Editor

A friend of mine, Lauren Redman, was recently given a brief for some adverts because she is studying that whole vibe. And I think I’m quite impressed! These are obviously only for a project, and so aren’t really “real” Well they are real in that you can see them below, but they aren’t really “real” If you know what I mean.

No? Ok but I don’t have time to explain this all.

I was never really a very intelligent person, and that’s why I hang out with the likes of Mike from BBDO, and people like Lauren, because then people think I’m intelligent. In all seriousness-ness-ness I’m a bit slooooooooooow, and never had the intellect to actually study something other than partay-ing!

Anyhoozer, the brief was for a target market of male’s, 20-30 years old, and the platform of Zero Consequences by the marketers. There are then photos of nights gone wild, where the only thing hiding the face of the guy in the incriminating photo is a Coke Zero. I think it perfectly sums up the male market of 20-30 years old, where we do from time to time (Or day to day in my case) do some crazy stuff, and all the photos ALWAYS end up on Facebook. Like that photo of me passed out in the apartment passageway in town.

I make joke! Seriously, I just say things like this because it makes me appear “cool”, so to say.

I really think it’s a great job that Lauren and her team have done. Here are two of the ads they conceptualised and created:

Contrary to popular belief, that second photo WAS NOT based on me that one night at Tiger Tiger in March this year. I swear.

There are a whole host more of these though, so please do click here and check them out on Laurens blog.

All this amazing stuff, all so early in the day!

Hey, I wasn’t named “Child Prodigy Of The World 1992-1999″ for nothing. Wait, I didn’t create those ads, Lauren and her team did.

You know what they say — “When in Rome”

Well done to Lauren and the team.

Sean Lloyd

Editor