Tanqueray gin vs Gordons Gin

I spent some time on the weekend studying the exterior of two bottles of gin, and I also spent about ten hours studying the contents of the bottles when I came towards an enlightened conclusion. Whatever that means. Do you ever read things in the newspapers, where columnists try and use the biggest words possible, and you have no idea what they are saying? And you just read on, hoping it will be put in context later so you might understand it? Well that’s what is happening to me right now, I don’t know what I’m writing.

So anyway, not one to merely taste my alcohol, I’m a connoisseur of sorts and like to delve deeper into the history behind the brands, the taste, the heritage and the bottle shape. What can I say…I’m a stickler! So after pouring myself a G&T, with some fresh lime, I sat down with Jerry D and Charlie V to take in a day of X-Box and deep thinking. Rad!

Anyway we had it all on Saturday, chilling in the apartment, X-Box, internet, gin, tonic, cheese grater abs, braai going on the balcony.

It was during a moment in Colin McRae Dirt where I took a sip of my drink, looked towards the sky(Well actually the ceiling) and thought “It’s…it’s…it’s beautiful!” Obviously we were drinking Tanqueray and so for that price it better damn well be beautiful!

Being the Ronnie Woods that we are, we also had a smaller bottle of Gordons gin available just in case of emergencies. Like for instance, if we had to walk to the shop, we could take the smaller bottle to fuel our walk to the shop. I was then doing an in depth study of both bottles when I looked across the room and said to Charlie V:

“I was just thinking now, can you taste the difference between Smirnoff Red and regular Smirnoff vodka?”

“No not really” came his reply.

And this is where my moment of clarity came in. I was pretty sure that most alcohol goes on some sort of marketing scheme, rather than pure taste, especially towards the younger market. Now this is obvious and anyone in marketing and advertising will tell you this, but my question is, how much more does it cost Smirnoff to produce Smirnoff Red vodka than it does to produce regular Smirnoff?

Smirnoff Red vodka says that it is “Triple Distilled” and that has been it’s trump card over regular Smirnoff. But then on a bottle of Russian Bear, it also says that it is triple distilled, yet Russian Bear is considerably cheaper than Smirnoff Red.

Smirnoff Red however is marketed to a different market, and it’s the type of drink you will see advertised in GQ magazine.

I do understand that there are vodkas that are made to be sipped on their own, without mixer, and this is an entirely different story. But Smirnoff Red vodka is not that great to be considered in these leagues and so will still more likely than not be mixed with Coke. And after mixing it with Coke, can you really, truly tell the difference between Russian Bear, Smirnoff and Smirnoff Red? I doubt you can. And especially after five drinks or so, when you start to get mildly hammered.

You know those evenings, when as more drinks go down the hatch, you start to pour yourself stiffer and stiffer drinks, yet they still taste the same as a single? This is my point. It’s hard enough to taste the difference on your first vodka and Coke, and I think it will be nearly impossible to taste the difference when you are drunk.

As I was saying about the gin though, I had come to study the two different bottles and was reading on the Gordons bottle, the following:

BY APPOINTMENT TO HER MAJESTY THE QUEEN TANQUERAY GORDON & COMPANY LIMITED LONDON ENGLAND GIN DISTILLERS.

I then looked over onto the Tanqueray bottle and saw the following:

BY APPOINTMENT TO HER MAJESTY THE QUEEN TANQUERAY GORDON & COMPANY LIMITED LONDON ENGLAND GIN DISTILLERS.

Mmmmm let’s see…what’s similiar…ummm…everything! Including the fact that on both bottles, the name “Gordon” and “Tanqueray” are used. Tanqueray is made in Britain though which could to some extent show in the price of it, while Gordon’s is distilled and bottled in South Africa.

Could there be a similarity here or am I just trying to convince myself that most booze is similiar and to the untrained palette will not taste any different?

Gordon’s gin is distilled three times while Tanqueray is distilled four times. Does this extra distillation make it better? If premium market vodka is distilled three times, is triple distilled gin then not just as good relatively speaking?

Anyway, have a look at the Tanqueray bottle available in South Africa:

And then the Gordons gin bottle, well this is the foreign one, but anyway:

You know what? The only thing similar there is the colour! I’m an idiot, I don’t know what I’m talking about!

But is there some sort of connection with Gordons and Tanqueray, or am I mistaken? Are they made by the same people? There are a few similarities and it’s interesting.

The more I drink the more I lose interest in this article.

But I tell you what, you try drink and write. It’s not as easy and fun as it sounds, even though when I write I sound like an international icon of everything excessive in life. It’s sometimes hard being me, and every hangover I am reminded that it was for a good cause. The cause was writing for my readers and for that I am eternally grateful.

I’m just going to pop to the shop to get some more lemons, or limes…don’t do anything I wouldn’t do while I’m gone.

And that’s how you waste a few minutes of your time, reading this. But you enjoyed it. I enjoyed writing it, but in this state, I would enjoy eating a section of tarred road.

Sean Lloyd

Editor